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“You have to commit to what you want, over and over and over again. This is what will ultimately allow you to create it in your life.” - Dr. Tonia Winchester, ND, NLP
LIKE TO LISTEN? I got you!
You know those moments, those passing phrases, those disarming conversations that just get you in the gut? Woof.
It's like they pull the rug out from under you and as you're tumbling to the hardwood floor (in slow mo of course) you're reevaluating everything that you've ever known to be true. The way you see the world has shifted and you know life will never be the same.
You know those moments, don't you?
I had one of those the other day. I was reading a light-hearted book about creating more luck. Ironically I don't believe in luck. To me, the concept of waiting for good luck to strike you is too passive and frankly, too victimy.
I prefer a more conscious, intentional, and active approach to creating what we want in our lives. The title of the book, "Conscious Luck" by Gay Hendricks caught my attention as an interesting twist and aligned with my ideas and beliefs.
If you’re lonely, it’s because on an unconscious level you’re more committed to being lonely than you are to being connected. If you’re overweight, it’s because on an unconscious level you’re more committed to being overweight than you are to being at a healthy weight. Your unconscious commitment to being overweight literally “outweighs” your conscious commitment to being at your ideal weight... If you’re unlucky, it’s because on some level (again, usually unconscious) you’re committed to being unlucky.
GULP. Kick in the gut. Tumbling in slow mo to the hardwood floor. WOAH.
And I know this, I talk about this with my clients. I tell them all about how their coaching breakthrough will require them to be 100% committed to the process and the tasking assignments I give them.
I share with them that if a pilot is leaving Vancouver and is only 99% committed to landing on the runway in Hawaii that she'll land 75 km away from it.
I inform them that if they are only 99% committed to the follow through required for their success that they are 1% committed to fail which is essentially being 100% committed to fail, because 99% just won't cut it, as we saw with the pilot example.
And yet reading this paragraph brought me face to face with all the lies I'd been telling myself. All the things I was actually committed to instead of what I had convinced myself I was. That was a hard pill to swallow.
You just have to look around in your life.
What are you experiencing? What are your relationships like? What about your health? And your fulfillment level at work? What about those hobbies that have been on your bucket list for years to pick up or get back to?
GULP.
The results of your commitments are all around you.
Are you committed to gaining your wedding day body back or are you committed to your chip-eating ritual every night? Are you committed to calming your anxiety or are you committed to staying stuck in the same agonizing pattern?
The day you commit to what you actually want instead of complaining about what you have (which you've unconsciously committed to) is the day your relationships, health, and life changes.
That night, after reading that paragraph, we BBQ'd hamburgers for dinner. My husband asked if I wanted a fresh bun, which he had just made. You can smell those fresh buns now, can't you?
"No thank you," I politely said. 'I'm just going to put the patty on a salad." I told him, "I've been trying to stop eating wheat for 5-6 years. Today is the day I stop trying and actually do it."
Then we had a Yoda tutorial where I butchered the voice (but not the quote) and he, line by line, schooled me in the proper intonation, inflection, and Yodaness. That's an aside.
Do or do not. There is no try.
- Yoda
I committed to skipping wheat that night. And the next day. And the day after that. Like someone in recovery, one day at a time. One meal at a time. One bite at a time.
That's the other cold, hard truth about commitments. You can't just make them once and expect to be successful. Sometimes the first commitment is the easiest part. The trickier part is recommitting to your new choice every minute, moment, day, and opportunity. Anyone who has spent decades in a loving relationship will tell you this. Saying your vows on your wedding day was just the beginning.
Now the kicker is if you have a deeper belief about why you can't commit to that thing (also something below the surface of your awareness, totally unconscious). For example maybe deep in your unconscious you believe that you're not worthy, or you don't deserve what you want, or good things only happen to other people. Those under-the-surface beliefs (I call these lurkers) will block you from being able to make that commitment.
And so we need to clear those beliefs out of your unconscious mind and reprogram new, self-affirming beliefs.
I'm letting you know I'm here to help.
There are two simple ways to work together.
This is where you’ll release the painful imprints of the past and go back into healing mode, easily able to create new habits and positive results in your health and life, then book a discovery call with me or my team.
We’ll spend 30 minutes helping you get very clear on what loops you’re wanting to close and where you’re wanting to go. If it’s a match I might invite you to enroll in a breakthrough and I’ll provide the easiest way to do that when we chat.
I very much look forward to connecting and in the meantime...
🧠💗💫May you choose to make all your dreams come true!
My clients are people stuck in their health or lives with burnout, insomnia , anxiety, or stress. After working with me they can calm their minds, sleep deeply, and find joy and energy again - all with out talk therapy or medications.
FOR SUPPORT ISSUES OR QUESTIONS, PLEASE EMAIL: vitality@toniawinchester.com
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