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Reframing aches, pain, aging and other symptoms

What If You Considered It This Way?

June 07, 20239 min read

"And I’m sure others, had they been inside my body, would have called that pain. Assumed something was wrong. But I assumed the opposite." - Coach Tonia

🤯What if our belief that something is wrong with us IS the root cause of our symptoms and diseases? 

LIKE TO LISTEN INSTEAD OF READ? I GOT YOU.

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My friend kindly excused herself from the group gathering. 

🥲Her eyes were leaking. She wasn’t crying because she was emotional. 

Her eyes had been watering for a couple hours and just wouldn’t let up. We were away on a rustic retreat weekend at a location with deep sentimental value to us. 

"Allergies?" She wondered. Maybe a specific new pollen she wasn’t exposed to back home? She had no other symptoms except her gushing eyeballs. 

🧩What we pieced together later was my friend was actually having a detox reaction. The staff had run bleach through the hot water lines, and there was still a lot of residual chlorine when she had her shower. The heat turned that into a gas, which she breathed in and also absorbed it into her skin. 


🎉The context of this weekend was a gathering of humans in their mid forties and fifties who had all worked together at a kids summer camp 20 to 25 years before. It was an epic reunion and a right, riot, ruckus, that’s for sure. 


As can happen with the passing of time, I noticed changes amongst the group.

  • More groans getting in and out of chairs.  

  • Less activity (except me who cut 20 minutes off my time of my solo hike up this mountain from the year previous). 

tonia climbs a mountain

  • More excuses for why they couldn’t or wouldn’t.

  • Body pains. Conditions. Concerns. Pending or recovering from surgeries. 

  • Complaints about getting older and what that all means. 


➡️This same friend said to me, “Tonia I don’t hear you complain about pain.” 

And she’s right.  Generally I have no pains to complain about. 

At this particular time I was aware of a sensation in my left glut muscle (aka ma butt).It definitely grabbed my attention with each step I took, and seemed to be getting more pronounced as the weekend wore on.


Here’s what tumbled out of my mouth when she shared her observation. 

💡“I’ve got this one thing right now that I know is just an adaptation to a new dance move that I’m learning.” 

🤣Hmmm… gosh. Sometimes I surprise myself at the unplanned, brilliant things that I say. 


And I’m sure others, had they been inside my body, would have called that pain. Assumed something was wrong. But I assumed the opposite. 

I believed with every fiber of my being that my body was doing everything right. Everything perfectly. 

It was adapting like a champ to the new moves I was practicing. 


And my friend's body was doing the same thing. It was expressing a perfectly reasonable adaptation to this toxic exposure. Her body was creating tears to release the chlorine from her system.


Perfect right? 

And it is. 


💫 And the truth is we all are. Perfect, that is. Exactly where we are. 


Everything - all symptoms - that our bodies are showing us - no matter how uncomfortable or painful - are perfect adaptations to whatever circumstances existed before, or continue to exist. 


Our bodies are not out to get us. They are not here to make us miserable. They are doing their best to adapt to whatever is going on… whatever we’re choosing to do (or not do) to our bodies. 


💗Our systems are so intelligent, and all contain a healing genius inside them. This is one of the main tenets of naturopathic medicine - that all organisms have an innate (yes it’s there without even needing to learn it or  consciously direct it) ability to heal and self correct. To adapt. 

🍃We even have a name for this. The Vis Medicatrix Naturae. The healing power within. My colleagues and I affectionately shorten the name to simply “The Vis.” 


🌳Another tenet is to get to the root cause of illness, instead of just treating the symptoms.

🤯 And what if… just for a moment stop and consider what if our belief that something is wrong with us IS the root cause of our symptoms and diseases? 

Obviously I’m going to suggest that belief as the only thing that is making us sick. But what if it played a part?

What would it be like if you could embody the belief that your system is actually perfectly adapted and adapting to whatever choices you’re making (or not making) and whatever your environment is offering you in return?

What would it mean if you believed that your Vis was actually doing its best to keep you well? 


Let's look at specific examples: 


An NLP colleague shares a story of growing up with debilitating migraines. Turns out, they served a really important purpose. When he was inebriated in pain and vomiting himself dry the house was quiet and his aggressive, drunk father left him alone.

His body had decided that this was the best adaptation for safety considering the circumstances.

Early on in his NLP journey he was able to reprogram this decision and since the initial thing to which he had adapted was no longer relevant, he hasn’t had a migraine since.

His system was not failing him. Just giving him feedback about what wasn’t working in his environment. 


When I kept choosing to stay in a toxic clinic situation, my body decided to gain 35 pounds in 1 year. Tremendous gain when my food and movement habits changed very little.

I see now my system was trying to create distance and protection from this scary human.

When I had my first NLP coaching breakthrough (I’m up to 4 now) I cleared the trauma out of my body, releasing this painful imprint of past experiences and significant emotional events. I  changed my internal programming so that I felt safe again.

I didn’t need the weight gaining behavior anymore. And it shed. Slowly, over several months, I returned to my baseline (highschool) weight. 


The thing is… I understand now… that even my colleague’s dad and my clinic mate were perfectly adapted to their pain and I’m assuming their trauma. 


That old adage: hurt people hurt people. 

I like this updated version: healed people heal people. 


I mention this in one of the early chapters of Break Through The Insomnia Cycle. 

And this brings us to the beautiful bridge that marries my two non-human life loves - Naturopathic medicine and neuro linguistic programming. 


There are certain convenient assumptions in NLP that corroborate what I believe to be true from Naturopathic Medicine. My favorites include: 

  1. People are not their behaviors, we can accept the person, and change the behavior. Everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have available (healed people heal people).

  2. Behavior is geared for adaptation, and present behavior is the best choice available. Every behavior is motivated by a positive intent (root cause). 

  3. People have all the Resources they need to succeed and to achieve their desired outcomes (the Vis). 

  4. There is ONLY feedback, no failure. (your body is doing everything perfectly right).

Everything that we perceive as problems is trying to have some sort of need met. There is a deeper intention. A higher purpose. 

I hold on to this belief and it keeps me sane when I think about some of the awful things that people do to each other in this world. Awful but perfectly adapted to their past pain.


So here we are. Wrapping this up. What do I want to leave you with? 

One. The curiosity. The what if. 

What if you considered your aches and pains and even diseases to be the best response to something that you’re choosing or not choosing in your environment? 


Two. The compassion. 

How can you start to pay attention to your genius system and connect with it, so you can learn what feedback it might be trying to offer you about your choices and your current (or past) situations? 


Three. The consideration. 

To what are you asking or to what have you been inadvertently asking your system to adapt? And pause and question, Is that good for you in the long run? Is this a short term chemical exposure and you just need to cry it out? Is this a consistent and regular hurtful lifestyle choice that is forcing your body into a corner of inflammation or disease? 


🥳🍑My butt pain? Gone. After about 3 days it dissolved and hasn’t returned. I believe this happened so quickly because of how I saw it. As a perfect adaptation. 


👉What circumstances are you perfectly adapted to? 

When you get honest with this question you next ask: 

Am I willing to change those circumstances so that my system can adapt in a more comfortable and safe way? 


And that’s exactly what I do.

I help people to make self-affirming decisions both consciously and unconsciously so that their bodies can go back into healing mode, they can get the rest they need and be primed to create healthy, positive, and enduring habits that propel them to reach specific health, wellness, and relationship goals. I help people create delightful situations for their systems to adapt to. 

And if that’s you, then here are two simple options to work together.

1️⃣First if you haven’t grab yourself a copy of Break Through The Insomnia Cycle.

BREAK THROUGH THE INSOMNIA CYCLE: HOW TO SLEEP DEEPLY, WAKE RESTED, AND ENJOY HAPPY, ENERGIZED DAYS

Breakthrough Burnout and Create Happy Energized Days

2️⃣Next if you’re really ready to have support on this...

Book yourself in for a call with myself or my team. We’ll chat heart to heart to find out if what you’re wanting is a match for how I love to help. And if it’s a fit I might invite you to work with me one-on-one in a brain-based coaching breakthrough program, where you’ll expedite your positive adaptation ability.

  1. Click the image below, to learn more

  2. Use the buttons on that page to click through to the book your discovery call.

  3. Fill out the application and book your time slot.

  4. We'll meet via Zoom, chat heart to heart to discover if where you're at and what you're wanting is a match for how I love to help and provide value.

  5. If it is a fit then I may invite you to work with me and I'll provide you all the steps to do that easily on our call.

What is a brain-based transformation breakthrough

I very much look forward to connecting and in the meantime...

🧠💗💫May you choose to make all your dreams come true!

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Dr. Tonia Winchester, ND, NLP

Dr. Tonia Winchester is a naturopathic doctor and Master Neurolinguistic Programming Coach. She helps humans who are struggling with stress, overwhelm, anxiety, and insomnia, to calm their minds, sleep deeply, and find joy and energy, so that they can create exceptional lives for themselves, their families, and their communities. Grab your copy of her book: Break Through the Insomnia Cycle, The How to Sleep Deeply, Wake Rested and Enjoy Happy Energized Days. toniawinchester.com

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